"I drive twelve miles a week," I replied.
"You have to think about the future, Ethan."
"Right now, I’m just thinking about getting to the grocery store."
She did not laugh. Karen rarely laughed when she felt she was teaching someone a lesson.
The first time I caught her stealing electricity, it was almost midnight.
I had gone outside because I heard a distinct scraping sound against the side of the house. At first, I assumed it was a raccoon rummaging through the bushes. But as my eyes adjusted to the dark, I saw it: a thick black cable running from the outlet beneath my side porch, snaking under the hedge, cutting across the grass, and trailing straight toward Karen’s driveway.
I followed it. The cable ended at the charging equipment securely connected to her Tesla.
I stood there for almost a full minute, letting the sheer audacity of it sink in. Then, I walked next door and knocked on her front door.
Karen answered wearing a plush robe, looking mildly annoyed. "Yes?"
I pointed toward the property line. "What is that?"
She looked toward the glowing cable. "Oh."
"Oh?" I echoed.
"My exterior outlet isn’t working."
"So you just plugged into mine?"
"It’s temporary."
"You didn’t ask."
"We’re neighbors, Ethan."
"That doesn’t make my meter your meter."
Karen folded her arms, her posture shifting into her default authoritative stance. "The HOA considers certain exterior utilities community accessible when necessary."
I stared at her, genuinely baffled. "What?"
She repeated it, slower this time, as if I were a child. "Community accessible."
"It’s attached to my house."
"It faces the common side setback."
"So does my kitchen window. Do you want to use that too?"
Her face tightened. "There’s no reason to become hostile."
"Unplug the car," I demanded.
"I’ll do it in the morning."
"No. Now."
She sighed dramatically, a theatrical display of being deeply inconvenienced by my unreasonableness. She marched toward the Tesla and disconnected it. I pulled the heavy extension equipment back onto my property.
Problem solved. At least, that’s what I thought.
Three nights later, the cable returned. This time, it was stealthily routed behind a bush. I marched outside and unplugged it immediately.